I am such a big fan of Shutterfly! For three years in a row, I have used the online company not only to store all of my photos (and you know, I have taken over 30,000 since I purchased my new camera. Needless to say, they often have the best prices on gifts, and after a home party last year, I knew that I had to stick with their awesome deals and creative formats. If I ever try to use another company, I end up frustrated because their layouts are not varied enough for me to actually like my Christmas card. If you're interested in all of Shutterfly's designs and easy-to-create cards, simply go to http://www.shutterfly.com/cards-stationery/christmas-photo-cards , and create some cards of your own.
As far as other gifts are concerned, I find that parents and family alike enjoy calendars. I have created two calendars at Shutterfly, and they have always been the favorite gift of family. If you'd like to see some of these calendars, be sure to visit http://www.shutterfly.com/calendars/wall-calendars . We have made these calendars for Joshua's family, my family, and friends during the holiday season especially.
I also love to create Bella's birthday cards using their designs. This year, I came up with a princess design and simply added a ribbon to the already-cute birthday invitations. To make your own birthday cards, visit http://www.shutterfly.com/cards-stationery/birthday-invitations .
What I love most about Shutterfly is that I feel the quality of my photos is not comprimised when I upload. I can always find plenty of designs, and enough varied designs that they actually look as if I have placed so much time and effort into them. Feel free to contact me should you have any questions. I'd love to help you create your own photo book as well! I've done four that have turned out beautifully, one for each of Bella's years and two for Christmas. You can find the books under http://www.shutterfly.com/photo-gifts . Happy creating!
Monday, December 13, 2010
Crises of Faith
As I look back on my experience thus far, I think my most growth has been experiential growth in my faith. I'm sad to say that I think many times I neglect the two other facets of faith more than I should, those being reading the Bible and praying. Now, don't get me wrong, I do pray in the sense that I am always praying about something during my day and with my daughter at night, but what I would really like the chance to do is pray more in a meditative, concentrated way. My mind is such that I am often distracted if I am not purposefully teaching someone something or working through a topic verbally. So, to be lost alone with the thoughts in my mind and to try to impose organization on them is something I need to work on more diligently.
As far as my Biblical growth is concerned, I think I've just used too many excuses; for example, I am too tired to work on the God things right now. I am a single mom who has to give all of my energy to my child or to my students. And as a result, I think situations that often have been crises of faith have been more anxiety-producing than they necessarily should be. When others have been less joyful than me or produced stress in my life through expectations placed on me, I think that my lack of Biblical grounding has caused me to almost feel panicked in certain situations. I say none of these things with a sense of pride that I have neglected them during this difficult trial, but I assume I find it amazing that the experiential part of faith has been something that has been able to operate during the time anyhow. I regret, though, that I could have probably felt more fullness and grown closer in my relationship with God had I been working on all three facets of faith at once.
But as far as the Biblical growth is concerned, I've decided to begin Experiencing God Bible study and meet with a group of ladies in order to give me some sense of accountability in this discipline of my faith. I can't help but feel like I could have gained more out of this entire experience. But, as far as what I've learned experientially, I have learned much. What rang particularly true with me last night as I was completing my study is that in our lives, we are greeted with crises of faith, that are bigger than us; they are God-sized.
And I guess in a metaphorical way, the experiences with renters in my home has mirrored the walk I have been taking with my husband (a God-sized trial), attempting to follow God's will and preserve my family through a difficult experience, often having to choose to believe in the evidence of things unseen. Needless to say, God provided me a set of renters to start with at the very moment I could not afford to pay for the house myself when I decided to stay home and work on my Masters. Though they were supposed to stay for a year, they left early. At that point, I had a crisis of faith wondering if God could come through for me since I could not afford to pay the mortgage on my own. And once again, he provided wonderful renters from seminary so that there was no gap in renters. After these individuals decided to leave early (and kindly leave me the deposit) again, there was no gap in provision for someone to rent my house. As it stands now, the renters will be perfectly scheduled to coincide with my schedule of moving back in the house. All of this to say, just as my renting experience has been filled with moments at which I had to trust the unseen, so has my decision to stay with my husband and preserve our family been filled with these same moments.
These moments involve choosing to trust that the new man is being created, that God has done something high and mighty in my husband's heart. Though I would love to have concrete evidence, a certificate that proves my husband has completely transferred over to the persona of the new man, my life will be spent trusting in that which is unseen. Sure, I have absolute evidence of my husband's change, in his attitude, his ability to cleave unto me, his seeking of spiritual things, and his desire to accept me. He has gained confidence in himself, something that was really not too terribly existent before, and his eyes have been cleared more to the world around him. I feel as if legalism has faded away, and he can see individuals more in the light of Christ's command for us to love God and love others. He has become a reader, and is hungry to study God's word. All of these things have worked together for me to see the new man.
However, I cannot say that there have not been these crises of faith, where I must trust in that which is unseen beyond the evidence of what is there for me at the time. Just as Experiencing God describes faith as occurring in steps, and not a one-time decision, so our lives during this time have been full of step by step decisions to continue trusting and believing in that which is not tangible. Needless to say, I will keep pursuing and keep seeking God's will beyond what the world tells me. I will continue to have joy even when there are those who seem to steal it from me. I will press on.
As far as my Biblical growth is concerned, I think I've just used too many excuses; for example, I am too tired to work on the God things right now. I am a single mom who has to give all of my energy to my child or to my students. And as a result, I think situations that often have been crises of faith have been more anxiety-producing than they necessarily should be. When others have been less joyful than me or produced stress in my life through expectations placed on me, I think that my lack of Biblical grounding has caused me to almost feel panicked in certain situations. I say none of these things with a sense of pride that I have neglected them during this difficult trial, but I assume I find it amazing that the experiential part of faith has been something that has been able to operate during the time anyhow. I regret, though, that I could have probably felt more fullness and grown closer in my relationship with God had I been working on all three facets of faith at once.
But as far as the Biblical growth is concerned, I've decided to begin Experiencing God Bible study and meet with a group of ladies in order to give me some sense of accountability in this discipline of my faith. I can't help but feel like I could have gained more out of this entire experience. But, as far as what I've learned experientially, I have learned much. What rang particularly true with me last night as I was completing my study is that in our lives, we are greeted with crises of faith, that are bigger than us; they are God-sized.
And I guess in a metaphorical way, the experiences with renters in my home has mirrored the walk I have been taking with my husband (a God-sized trial), attempting to follow God's will and preserve my family through a difficult experience, often having to choose to believe in the evidence of things unseen. Needless to say, God provided me a set of renters to start with at the very moment I could not afford to pay for the house myself when I decided to stay home and work on my Masters. Though they were supposed to stay for a year, they left early. At that point, I had a crisis of faith wondering if God could come through for me since I could not afford to pay the mortgage on my own. And once again, he provided wonderful renters from seminary so that there was no gap in renters. After these individuals decided to leave early (and kindly leave me the deposit) again, there was no gap in provision for someone to rent my house. As it stands now, the renters will be perfectly scheduled to coincide with my schedule of moving back in the house. All of this to say, just as my renting experience has been filled with moments at which I had to trust the unseen, so has my decision to stay with my husband and preserve our family been filled with these same moments.
These moments involve choosing to trust that the new man is being created, that God has done something high and mighty in my husband's heart. Though I would love to have concrete evidence, a certificate that proves my husband has completely transferred over to the persona of the new man, my life will be spent trusting in that which is unseen. Sure, I have absolute evidence of my husband's change, in his attitude, his ability to cleave unto me, his seeking of spiritual things, and his desire to accept me. He has gained confidence in himself, something that was really not too terribly existent before, and his eyes have been cleared more to the world around him. I feel as if legalism has faded away, and he can see individuals more in the light of Christ's command for us to love God and love others. He has become a reader, and is hungry to study God's word. All of these things have worked together for me to see the new man.
However, I cannot say that there have not been these crises of faith, where I must trust in that which is unseen beyond the evidence of what is there for me at the time. Just as Experiencing God describes faith as occurring in steps, and not a one-time decision, so our lives during this time have been full of step by step decisions to continue trusting and believing in that which is not tangible. Needless to say, I will keep pursuing and keep seeking God's will beyond what the world tells me. I will continue to have joy even when there are those who seem to steal it from me. I will press on.
Saturday, December 11, 2010
Link for bloggers
Here is the shutterfly link for bloggers!
http://blog.shutterfly.com/5358/holiday2010-blog-submission-form/
Last year, I did my Christmas cards there after a House party and they turned out the best they've ever turned out! I can't wait to make a puzzle for Isabella for Christmas.
http://blog.shutterfly.com/5358/holiday2010-blog-submission-form/
Last year, I did my Christmas cards there after a House party and they turned out the best they've ever turned out! I can't wait to make a puzzle for Isabella for Christmas.
Thanksgiving update....late ;)
Hello everyone,
I do apologize for the lateness of this update. In all truth, I received Joshua's typed update a week ago and have not responded by writing my own reflection on this month until now. If anything I feel as if often I cannot write if my writing is not somehow meaningful to me. Thus, to write before now would have been a superficial act, and for some reason, that feels wrong to me. I trust that the timeliness of the updates is not our primary goal in doing them. I think they allow reflection for both Joshua and me in order to process this time. Perhaps they are even more for our own personal benefit than yours. Regardless, if you do have an interest in receiving his updates before I have the time/words to write, I am glad to send the typed updates onto you before I complete my part of them.
If anything, this month has really been a reflection on how one's circumstances change the person. It is such a priviledge for me to interact with my students on a day to day basis, and teaching them has been so enlightening to me. If anything else, I see such real people, meaningful with their words, and full of personal reflection upon their circumstances. So many of them have difficult lives, but for some reason, to me, that makes them teachers, who teach me so much about what really matters in life: respecting the human beings around us and communicating in real, tangible ways with those around us about the deep meaning of life, not just its materalistic elements. In many ways, I feel as if I have lived much of my life focused on my own bubble, unable to see the real plight of those around me. I feel I have been wrapped up in the myth of meritocracy, believing that individuals always do well if they work hard enough. However, it's harder to make it when they haven't started out with all the right circumstances. Not only is there financial poverty, but there is a poverty of encouragement, poverty of spirit, poverty of academics, and so much more in these kids' lives. But what value they place on life and knowing the hearts of others in life! I look up to them for realizing the essence of what life truly is.
Personally, I have been a bit down during particular parts of the month. Rejection is something that really gets me down, and in some circumstances, I really just do not feel valuable to some individuals. I feel as if I represent the taboo instead of the customary, safe, and predictable. In a lot of ways, I feel like the odd one out. I'm not always accepted across the board, and sometimes I feel I have to play the part of someone I am not. During those times, because my true self does not work in particular circumstances, I just shut down and become the quiet person I am not. In the words of Emerson, I want to "suck the marrow out of life" and be able to communicate my experiences. In my view, when I cannot do so freely, I see no need for communicating whatsoever. However, this teaching position has been the perfect place for me to communicate and life fully, and my church has also been a place of total acceptance. When I do not have that person around with whom I communicate freely and easily (besides the Lord), I tend to feel the lack of acceptance more strongly. However, working with these kids really reminds me what matters in life. When I am exposed to them, my particular situations pale in comparison to what they face.
Isabella is doing well, correcting my grammar, as a matter of fact. Yesterday, I asked, "Can I please have the coupon book," and she corrected me with "No, say MAY I have the coupon book." She's a bundle of energy and I am so blessed to have her around. She now puts on "shows" on the bed (because she can look at herself in the mirror) and invites everyone to come watch her. She dresses up in her princess dresses during this time. Actually, she forces everyone to come watch. She ends up creating a song all her own, that may be a take off on another song. She takes a bow and is super proud of herself. Even her drawings are becoming more advanced as she grows. It's so neat to watch the changes she goes through. I feel, though, as if there is not enough of me to go around. I give myself to students all during the day and then come home to being a full time mom without a husband (though my family helps so much!). I end up going to bed early, usually, and I feel as if I can get nothing done that needs to be done. Any holiday I have, I travel to see my husband. I am grateful to be with him and grow closer together, but at the same time, I usually become worn out and sick after I travel. Parenting is also difficult, though, because I do not feel I have much energy left at the end of the day to give to her.
I do apologize for the lateness of this update. In all truth, I received Joshua's typed update a week ago and have not responded by writing my own reflection on this month until now. If anything I feel as if often I cannot write if my writing is not somehow meaningful to me. Thus, to write before now would have been a superficial act, and for some reason, that feels wrong to me. I trust that the timeliness of the updates is not our primary goal in doing them. I think they allow reflection for both Joshua and me in order to process this time. Perhaps they are even more for our own personal benefit than yours. Regardless, if you do have an interest in receiving his updates before I have the time/words to write, I am glad to send the typed updates onto you before I complete my part of them.
If anything, this month has really been a reflection on how one's circumstances change the person. It is such a priviledge for me to interact with my students on a day to day basis, and teaching them has been so enlightening to me. If anything else, I see such real people, meaningful with their words, and full of personal reflection upon their circumstances. So many of them have difficult lives, but for some reason, to me, that makes them teachers, who teach me so much about what really matters in life: respecting the human beings around us and communicating in real, tangible ways with those around us about the deep meaning of life, not just its materalistic elements. In many ways, I feel as if I have lived much of my life focused on my own bubble, unable to see the real plight of those around me. I feel I have been wrapped up in the myth of meritocracy, believing that individuals always do well if they work hard enough. However, it's harder to make it when they haven't started out with all the right circumstances. Not only is there financial poverty, but there is a poverty of encouragement, poverty of spirit, poverty of academics, and so much more in these kids' lives. But what value they place on life and knowing the hearts of others in life! I look up to them for realizing the essence of what life truly is.
Personally, I have been a bit down during particular parts of the month. Rejection is something that really gets me down, and in some circumstances, I really just do not feel valuable to some individuals. I feel as if I represent the taboo instead of the customary, safe, and predictable. In a lot of ways, I feel like the odd one out. I'm not always accepted across the board, and sometimes I feel I have to play the part of someone I am not. During those times, because my true self does not work in particular circumstances, I just shut down and become the quiet person I am not. In the words of Emerson, I want to "suck the marrow out of life" and be able to communicate my experiences. In my view, when I cannot do so freely, I see no need for communicating whatsoever. However, this teaching position has been the perfect place for me to communicate and life fully, and my church has also been a place of total acceptance. When I do not have that person around with whom I communicate freely and easily (besides the Lord), I tend to feel the lack of acceptance more strongly. However, working with these kids really reminds me what matters in life. When I am exposed to them, my particular situations pale in comparison to what they face.
Isabella is doing well, correcting my grammar, as a matter of fact. Yesterday, I asked, "Can I please have the coupon book," and she corrected me with "No, say MAY I have the coupon book." She's a bundle of energy and I am so blessed to have her around. She now puts on "shows" on the bed (because she can look at herself in the mirror) and invites everyone to come watch her. She dresses up in her princess dresses during this time. Actually, she forces everyone to come watch. She ends up creating a song all her own, that may be a take off on another song. She takes a bow and is super proud of herself. Even her drawings are becoming more advanced as she grows. It's so neat to watch the changes she goes through. I feel, though, as if there is not enough of me to go around. I give myself to students all during the day and then come home to being a full time mom without a husband (though my family helps so much!). I end up going to bed early, usually, and I feel as if I can get nothing done that needs to be done. Any holiday I have, I travel to see my husband. I am grateful to be with him and grow closer together, but at the same time, I usually become worn out and sick after I travel. Parenting is also difficult, though, because I do not feel I have much energy left at the end of the day to give to her.
Yay for Shutterfly.
Bloggers can get 50 free Christmas cards at shutterfly.com. This is so super exciting as I love shutterfly and use it consistently for my other pictures and projects. I'm hoping to post all of our updates to this blog during the break so all of you can read them!
Click this link for details:
Click this link for details:
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